You really coming over, don't trick.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
