Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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