I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize