This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i will never coherently bang her
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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