Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
