Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.