Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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