Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
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whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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