STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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