I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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