had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
