So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
They should really pass out barf bags in church
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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