Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Enjoy the penises
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
