Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
