Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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