You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
