Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
