You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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