just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
