I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize