Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
