i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize