you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
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I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
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You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.