I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered