Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.

  (231): View more from Michigan

  better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night. (231): better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you. http://tfl.nu/vawi
  Replies (3) Good night (929) Bad night (2129)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion. http://tfl.nu/50jg
  Replies (86) Good night (3465) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I love having hate sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I love having hate sex. http://tfl.nu/fz63
  Replies (43) Good night (5369) Bad night (899)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone http://tfl.nu/fyy6
  Replies (32) Good night (7227) Bad night (988)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick. http://tfl.nu/b0h6
  Replies (19) Good night (4860) Bad night (2134)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out http://tfl.nu/n0iw
  Replies (9) Good night (1029) Bad night (3615)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice. http://tfl.nu/9vs4
  Replies (9) Good night (2910) Bad night (1224)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes http://tfl.nu/ayyp
  Replies (29) Good night (4242) Bad night (1392)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest. http://tfl.nu/yx0q
  Replies (21) Good night (3947) Bad night (827)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun? http://tfl.nu/1gt4
  Replies (10) Good night (2382) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm in love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot. (630): I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/l0w2
  Replies (3) Good night (1599) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch. http://tfl.nu/uy0f
  Replies (2) Good night (933) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet... http://tfl.nu/1uxq
  Replies (2) Good night (432) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush http://tfl.nu/jhnr
  Replies (0) Good night (357) Bad night (486)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog http://tfl.nu/gmkp
  Replies (1) Good night (580) Bad night (207)

Randomize