i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
