Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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