My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
