Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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