He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
