why didn't you poke me back
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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