ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
