y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Vodka?
Forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize