I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Enjoy the penises
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
