you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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