Texts From Last Night

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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I thidmdmk you'gre a special person

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  (919): I thidmdmk you'gre a special person http://tfl.nu/mmrm
  Replies (1) Good night (1410) Bad night (628)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me

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  (403): If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me http://tfl.nu/3lvx
  Replies (25) Good night (1060) Bad night (3517)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back

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  (920): dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back http://tfl.nu/zgqj
  Replies (32) Good night (830) Bad night (3267)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.

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  (520): 2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out. http://tfl.nu/1knp
  Replies (26) Good night (8296) Bad night (1761)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me

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  (516): Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me http://tfl.nu/nv09
  Replies (8) Good night (3197) Bad night (882)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.

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  (484): walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad. http://tfl.nu/s89m
  Replies (8) Good night (3858) Bad night (1027)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.

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  (306): Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me. http://tfl.nu/vlc7
  Replies (2) Good night (2291) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325

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  (910): Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly. (910): im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325 http://tfl.nu/vc15
  Replies (26) Good night (989) Bad night (2529)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.

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  (519): Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud. http://tfl.nu/laot
  Replies (20) Good night (2008) Bad night (1050)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.

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  (225): If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place. http://tfl.nu/rizd
  Replies (16) Good night (1540) Bad night (716)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?

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  (440): Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick? http://tfl.nu/vf93
  Replies (5) Good night (980) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on

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  (609): Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on http://tfl.nu/f543
  Replies (2) Good night (933) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?

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  (403): I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work? http://tfl.nu/hj1o
  Replies (2) Good night (537) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself

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  (570): This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself http://tfl.nu/5o6a
  Replies (0) Good night (339) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just want to make out with him forever

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  (203): I just want to make out with him forever http://tfl.nu/lf08
  Replies (1) Good night (558) Bad night (300)

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