She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize