better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
