he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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