im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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