i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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