Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
