Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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