I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
