she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
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I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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