I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
