so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize