Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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