do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize