thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize