Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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