Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize