Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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